February 5, 2006

  • I can’t lie and say things have been hectic lately.

    I haven’t worked since school started, but that doesn’t mean I’m outta
    the job. I’m choosing not to cuz I’ve already failed this semester once
    and there sure as hell AIN’T NO EXCUSE to fail again.
    So…had to lay down the law, crack open the books, and keep my nose
    deep inside them!! So deep its my f*ing night pillow!! Spilling blood
    every where from creating notecards and getting endless paper cuts.

    Ok Ok…..now I’m just overdoing it, but……I’ve just been wanting to focus on school & spending family time.

    When I’m off on break all I do is work, and every now & then get time with the family if I’m not too exhausted from work.

    Now at this time…..I’m pretty pissy from PMSing with a bad ass splitting headache!!

    Every little thing is bothering me—-smells, colors, how bright the
    sun can be. As if I’ve been drinking the whole night before and have to
    wear sunglasses even indoors. Gets me thinking….WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME??
    But, of course, being in the nursing field I can blame it all on my
    hormones. Oh wait, you don’t need to be in the nursing field to realize
    that…YOU JUST NEED TO BE A WOMAN!!

    Its been so long since I’ve had a meaningful update.
    Something personal…not just your everyday update just with pictures
    as if thats a true insite into myself, me, the I.

    Honestly….I’m not sure if there really is anything meaningful. I
    really don’t have anything to complain about. I realized that as the
    new year turned the clock kept ticking….all the remedial/petty
    bullshit people so often live their lives by, (“oh she’s/he has this much better than me/ damn look at them carrying themselves this way/ what a f*ing whore“) petty kid bullshit is just what it is. PETTY BULLSHIT.
    I’m over the shit talking, being envious of what another person has
    better than me/or what I think is better than what I have. I’m at the
    point of, WHO F*ING CARES?!?
    Why should I sweat their shit when I can just bust my ass and say in
    the end when I’ve got what I want that I worked my ass off to get this
    and it feels DAMN good to know I EARNED it!!

    I could go for pancakes!! Lots of butter!!

    Damn this PMSing shit!!!!!! DAMN FEMALE HORMONES!! <<—-random, yes, I know

    I’m sorry I haven’t left a meaningful comment on anybody’s xanga. I do
    care about everybody still, but, I just haven’t had the drive I used
    to…the excitement to go on. When I kept updating it was like I was
    motivated to do so. Xanga was exciting. It still is every now and then,
    but there’s so much more going on it just isn’t at the top of my list.


    Pretty much the only thing thats been going through my head lately is the future.


    I’m gonna be a nurse    ….the one thing in the world I’ve been wanting. I
    realized that when I take care of people I love it. Regardless of how
    bad a day it might be….no matter how much my patients shit all at the
    same time/ how much each one of them complains nonstop / how psycho and
    combative they can be….when my shift is over and I’m driving home, I
    feel accomplished and proud of what I’ve done. Out of all the people I
    may have taken care of, there’s at least one I’ve touched and while
    they were in the hospital might have actually felt better.


    On so many people’s occupation/education on their profile they put
    medical. Sometimes I wonder if they really know what being in the
    medical field is all about. What makes me mad the most is those that
    are only it it for the  MONEY and stability. Stability I
    understand…you need that in life. But to run your life only because
    of the money will get you nowhere. You’ll get put into a 12 hr. shift
    3-4 times a week and your ass will get burnt out!! Lemme just be f*ing
    honest.


    I ABSOLUTELY HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE GET INTO NURSING JUST BECAUSE OF THE
    MONEY    !! I truly hate it with a passion. Its the one thing that boils my
    blood/ cringes me over to where I just wanna punch that person in the
    face. I’ve seen it on my floor. People get so sick of having to give
    the patient’s medication, they talk all this shit about how the patient
    is just lying and wanting attention, and can’t wait till their shift is
    over. I understand if you’ve been working shift after shift and all you
    want to do is get home/ get in bed / and spend time with your kids. But
    when you’re at the point where each patient is just another paycheck to
    you and each one of them just wants attention and they’re not telling
    the truth about how they feel. You don’t need to be there!!


    Its so true when they say, look at each one of those people as if they
    could be your family member. As cliche’ and cheezy as it may sound its
    damn true!!

    I had to get that all off my chest. I’ve just been seeing it over and
    over again in school. Students who still can’t believe they have to
    wipe ass. They’d rather push the meds and completely forget and don’t
    stay in touch with the basics/foundation.

January 11, 2006

  • CLICK to ENLARGE


    I was having a good makeup day. Now my hair is pitch black.

    = The wedding of Mr. & Mrs. Philip Amidar =

    Time for the wedding….ta ta ta da ((singing the wedding song))


    Philip & his groomsmen


    2 of the 5 bridesmaids, Mary Ellen & Stephanie (Kimmie’s godmother)


    Kimmie & the rest of the beautiful flower girls


    Philip waiting @ the alter……here comes the bride ((tear falls))


    beautiful outdoor wedding


    exchanging of the vows & rings


    prayer around the newlywed couple // groomsmen and the ring barer NOT paying attention, hehe!!


    my baby behaved soooo well, I was so PROUD!!


    you may now, kiss the bride….AWWWW!!



    announcing….MR. & MRS. PHILIP AMIDAR!!


    time to make an exit, Stephanie w/her partner


    this was hillarious, Joobs walked out with NOT one, but TWO bridesmaids. Everybody cracked up!!


    all the flower girls did GREAT considering majority of them did NOT go to the rehearsal, including Kim!!

    My beautiful flower girl

    The beautiful bride, Mrs. Mona Lisa Amidar & her court


    Kim didn’t think she had enough flowers, so she picked some more..hehe!!

    The whole wedding court


    Ninang Susan // Ninang Stephanie


    time to run off & PARTAYYYYYYY!!

    The wedding was BEAUTIFUL!
    I’ve been to only 2 other weddings and I must say, the colors
    of Mona Lisa’s & Philip’s were extraordinary!! The day started off
    collllllllllllddddd but right before the wedding began after pictures
    were taken the sun came out and it warmed up outside. The wind died
    down, and everything just seemed PERFECT!!

    Kim was
    gorgeous, I was totally proud and not minding gloating & bragging
    about my beautiful daughter that day. Total strangers were even telling
    me that she was beautiful and one of the most precious flower girls.
    Yes, yes…..I KNOW!! Hehehe!! Nothing wrong with being totally
    conceited in your child every once in a while.

  • HAPPY BELATED 2006 EVERYBODY!!


    I can’t believe its 2006, damn how the days pass soooo fast. The clock just keeps ticking away, seconds turn into minutes into hours into the end of the day before the blink of an eye.


    Before we know and realize it…another year has flown by. Our kids age some more, WE AGE…..and in the end, do we have anything good and worth while to remember it all by.


    Regardless of the bad…..there’s always some good. And regardless of how bad things get, the good seems to always outweigh all the bullshit the year has to throw.


    Kim turned 5, I turned 22, Quang 29. Damnnnn…..he’ll be the BIG 3-0 this year. Gotta do it big this year for him. Hmmmmm…tickets to Vegas? Spur of the moment drive thru wedding with Elvis as the witness?? Sure is a thought to ponder on.


    What does 2006 hold for me??????


    I really can’t say that 2005 was too bad. Yah…I had to readmit back into the nursing program, drama here & there…….but……..nothing life threatening or totally depressing that made me want to shrivel up into the fetal position, naked in some dark corner with droplets of water falling on my forehead. Nothing torturous like that…….


    All in all—————THANK YOU GOD for blessing my family/loved ones/myself with good health despite the downs in the health of some. You allowed a family to join together stronger than they ever had been before, wake up and realize that today could be a last day. No longer take for granted the loved ones who surround us. Thank you for granting me the strength to pursue what I truly want and love as much as my family (nursing).





    I’m not about to go on and on about the things that stick out in my mind about this year and have a list that takes up my entire page.


    Honestly….xanga has lost its attraction that once held me so compelled and obsessed with wanting to update.


    I’ve been so busy working, waiting for school to finally get back to me, and spending time with family/friends in my free time.


    School did get back to me, I HAVE BEEN REACCEPTED!! Got a meeting I have to go to to register & pay for classes this Friday before work. Also realized this Friday I’m the ONLY PCT to the floor…..do you know what that means????? Shiiiiiiet….a damn big ass load of patients for me to take care of. Yah…there’s nurses but regardless of how many nurses there are they’re always complaining. How bout you step into my shoes and take the vital signs for the whole floor, blood sugars, plus get the total care patients turned every 2 hours like you’re supposed to. Is that even gonna be possible???? NOT WITHOUT HELP!!


    Then….gotta pull a 16 hour shift the next day…and..once again I’ll be all ALONE after 1st shift. What the hell?????? My paycheck better be kick ass!!


    I’m already thinking of what to get Quang for Father’s Day. Shiet…my mom’s bday is coming up in February. Wanna treat her for a day at the spa. Hair done/colored, manicure, pedicure….ohhhhh yahhhhh!!


    Got the chance to hit the bars and hang out with friends while they were in town for winter break. THANK GOD!! Tried new drinks….Royal Fuck, a Blow Job…what the hell?? Have porn stars taken over the bar?? As long as they don’t spread any STDs on the drinks I’m all down for downing any of those.


    I’ll be updating soon with LOTS of pictures..I know I know..been saying it and haven’t actually done it, but…..I’ve been editing them while I’m off from work. So bare with me!!

December 25, 2005

  • DAAAAMMMNNNNN its been bout a day since I updated!!


    Its crazy how much can happen in just a matter of a couple of months. So much to say, too many words….maybe I’ll tell it all in a protected post.


    To sum it all up, the semester has ended……


    turns out I made a “D” in lecture so….gotta repeat and according to my school’s policies, I’ve gotta READMIT!! Yah….some bullshit right?? NO JOKE!! Hate it, regretting I even went to this school and gave them hundreds, most possibly thousands of my dollars!! BITCHES!!


    But…I’m not gonna let it get me down. I’ve decided to look at this experience as a positive. I know what to expect from tests for this semester considering I finished the semester. So….I’LL KICK ASS at them this time around. I’ve already finished my skills..and might I add…I GOT A F-ing “A“! Hell-to-the-yah!! Finished my OBGYN/Pedi/Labor & Delivery/2nd part of Med-Surg Clinicals…..another “A“!!


    **throws a middle finger in the air directed to the school**


    At least those mofos know I can perform, I just can’t take tests!!


    So…since school has been out, I’ve gone back to work. I tried to get them to schedule me for more than 40 hrs and all the holidays, but last minute they changed up my schedule. Lots of things have changed at work since I’ve been gone. All kinds of different ways of carrying out procedures & policies. Including my PRN status. So…..for the time being if I work 40 hrs thats pretty much all I can get in a pay period.Yah…that SUCKS too!!


    I was alllllll ready to be a nurse extern, but………GOTTA STOP COMPLAINING!!


    Enough about my stuff……..


    More important things have been going on.


    MY BABY TURNED 5!! Will post pictures soon……I’ve got a shietload of em on my camera.


    We celebrated Kimmie’s bday at Chuck-e-Cheese and boy oh boy did she get a lot of loot. Toys that have already made it into a corner waiting for her to play with them, possibly permanently forgotten. Kimmie took Christmas pictures at school, need to scan those for all to see. I can’t believe she’s FIVE, I can’t believe she’s soooo smart, talking like she’s an adult……I CAN’T BELIEVE ALL KINDS OF THINGS!!


    My grandmama turned 81 yesterday!!


    Quang & I are the same-ol-same. Its crazy to think that 2006 will mark 9 years for us….and seeing how a year can fly by it’ll be DOUBLE DIGIT 10 years before I know it. And do I have a ring yet??? UMMMMMMM……NO!


    There’s so much more for me to update on, but I’ll save that for another time. With LOTS of pictures!! I won’t be working this week so I’ll have tons of time to update.


    MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!!


    MISS ALL MY FAVORITE XANGANS!! Sorry I’ve been MIA for so long. I’ll try my best to comment everybody, if I leave a few out I’m sooooorrrrrrry!! Ya’ll know I got nothing but love for yah!!

October 25, 2005

  • Most likely I won’t be updating till this semester is over.


    Its been crazy and on my lecture tests I’ve been totally SUCKING!!


    I miss my mom & grandma…they’re back in the Philippines, won’t be back till Nov. 2..been gone since Oct. 2.


    Kim is doing GREAT!! She’s growing so fast and she’ll be 5 soon. AHHHHH!! FIVE!!


    Quang & I weren’t doing good for a while. I had to study for one of the biggest tests this semester (Pharmacology test) and I had to look over 250 meds. I had the weekend to study and he ends up kicking my drugs cards everywhere and gets mad that I had them everywhere. Mad at me not doing what I’m supposed to have done or be doing (laundry/clean/etc.). So I got mad that he couldn’t be understanding, ended up yelling…in front of Kim (of course made things worse and made me feel like the worst person in the world)….also made me feel like I was the wrong one. Anyhow…….everything was just going wrong. I had already FAILED both my 1st tow lecture tests then having the Pharm. test come up…..I HAD AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN!!


    I was seriously trying to prepare myself to not be with Quang. I kept repeating in my head over and over again…”now its really crunch time!! FUCK this bastard if he can’t be understanding…fuck him for not being willing to just be there for me!!” I didn’t want to be with him. I didn’t appreciate the way he didn’t even want to understand. It hurt like hell. I’m not going to school just for my own good. I’m going to help create a better life for US. Not me….US!! You would think by now with us being together for 8 years already he would be more emotionally supportive. HELL THE FUCK NO!!


    Anyhow….of course what ends up happening as time goes by?


    Well..first off….I passed my Pharm test!! OHHH HELL YAHHHH!! So I just felt too good and had to tell somebody so I told Quang. From then on…..we’ve been doing ok. Since the fight he’s actually been helping me by giving me “quiet” time when I need to study. Surprisingly we’ve had a few deep conversations. Now the focus is just on moving out by next year….searching for a house starting in the spring (ugh!!)…..finishing school (ugh x 2!!)….EVERYTHING!!


    I’m trying to find a 2nd job that I can work at during the week. I’ve got an offer at school…I don’t even care how much they pay cuz I spend majority of my life there anyway, might as well get paid for being up there. Plus..its part time so I’ll still get time to study. PLEASE GOD LET THIS HAPPEN!!


    I’m sorry I haven’t been commenting like usual….if anything…when I have time I’ll just update with pix. For now…I’ve got TONS of studying I gotta get done and just get through the rest of this semester.

October 6, 2005

October 5, 2005

  • I’m sorry its taken so long for me to comment anybody back, update….everything.


    Most of the problem is school. This semester SUCKS ASS!! I don’t even mean that in a joking way. I thought I hated last semester, last semester really is NOTHING compared to all of this. All I had to worry about last semester was unit tests in lecture, skills check offs, and turning in my care plans. This semester is a whole different thing. There isn’t even words that can totally describe it. Its like sensory overload that feels like you can never recover from. You look, search, and wait for that light at the end of the tunnel and all you keep doing is bump into dark walls.


    IT SUCKS!!


    Last semester I told myself that I would do good and get all A’s or at least A’s & B’s this semester. Now all I want is for it to be OVER. I just want to pass.


    On top of everything for school I’m not able to work. Most of my time has to be dedicated to getting shit done this semester. I know I know…I should focus on school first & foremost, but….everybody needs money. I don’t have health insurance now that I’m 22, I don’t have enough hrs. at work to get health insurance. So….I applied for medicaid and I’m seriously praying that I’ll get approved.


    Shit….a shitload of my paycheck is going to paying for medicaid,


    so why the hell not give it to me!!


    I didn’t think I’d miss working, but I do. There are times when I wish I didn’t have to be at school, I wish I was at work wiping ass. I get more gratification seeing that I’ve satisfied a patient doing the smallest task for them rather than being at school sitting in my lecture class hearing my teacher tell stories about her own damn personal life rather than getting on with the damn material!!


    Forget even talking about it anymore. My performance this semester just makes me mad. I know all my complaints stems from me being unprepared. But still….I wanna bitch & moan.


    My grandma & mom left for the Philippines this past Sunday. I didn’t think I would miss them much cuz I thought of how I’d have no nagging, no repeat questions cuz of not being able to hear my answer, a small feeling of being on my own. But…..I miss the nagging. They’ll be gone for a month, and its only been 2 days since they left…and I already miss them. Thank God they made it to the Philippines ok. Jet lagged, but they’re doing good.


    THANK YOU GOD!!


    Kim is doing GREAT!! If you tell her how to spell her name a letter at a time ” K I M B E R L Y…” she’ll repeat each letter you told her in her cute voice and write each letter. To me, she writes it practically perfect…even with her backward E’s.


    She talks sooooo much!! I can’t believe she’s talking as well as she is. I still remember when she used to just say “Dada.” I’m so happy she’s interested in educational activities rather than just watching regular TV all day. The one big problem she has is the exact same problem I had. She doesn’t like criticism, getting told what to do, and she has a hell of a short temper!! She has to pick her own clothes, she has to match them herself….God…I don’t remember being that independent when I was little. Well..she gets the short temper from me (and her Daddy, but he won’t admit it) and her independence from her Daddy.


    Quang and I….doing good. Didn’t do anything special for our 8 year anniversary. I feel bad….cuz we don’t have an official day. There isn’t an exact day when he asked me formally to be his “girlfriend.” We didn’t even expect for us to last this long. I know that when I met him, I didn’t want to be with him in a long-term relationship. We got so sick of each other in the beginning I don’t even know how we pulled through. Even before I was ever pregnant with Kim we had such problems. But…here we are.


    He gave me such a great birthday gift. He purchased a spa treatment with a facial, pedicure/manicure for me which lasts for 4 hrs. Of course I was hoping for a ring, but….thats ok. He took me and my family out to eat at the Cheesecake Factory. Then his brother, wife, kiddos…Quang’s sisters, and Quang’s friend & gf ate dinner together and got treated by Quoc & Co. (THANKS YA’LL!!) at one of my favorite Asian restaurants. YUM YUM!! I’m sure I gained at least 5 lbs. just that day.


    Its crazy how things have turned out. I got in touch with one of my closest friends/godsister recently and reminisced. If things had been different I would be finishing up my degree in nursing and would have attempted being a traveling nurse. Been ballin’, jettin’ around the U.S., living on my own. Or else, I would have joined the Navy like I wanted to right after high school. Going out whenever and where ever I want to. But…..


    I’m totally content, satisfied, and very


    happy that things ended up like this.


    Having Kim has made me into such a better woman. Without her I would have moved up from doing E* & acid to trying something even more stupid that could have left me brain dead & totally stupid. Without Quang, I might have met a man that demeaned me and tried to overpower me every chance he had. I wouldn’t have attempted becoming an independent woman. I wouldn’t be ok with myself, I’d just be wasting my life. Living the life I am right now….I don’t feeling like I’m wasting any bit of myself. I’m working my way to a greater, better life. Hell yah its full of struggle, but so what. Its that struggle that makes me want it more. It makes me pull/push and fight even harder.


    Enough of the self-philosophy….on to the good stuff. PICTURES!!


    <<WE be CLUBBIN>>




    <<Daddy the great Baseball Player>>





    Quang plays softball with his companies team. They’re not great, but….this is the first time playing for many of the players on the team. So……lets just leave it at that!!


    <<Rangers Game>>






    Quang thought it would be a good idea to check out a TX Rangers game the day before my birthday. We went last minute expecting to buy tickets @ the gate. Quang sees this one guy walking in the opposite direction we’re going in, he approaches 2 guys walking in front of us and we overhear him saying he’s got some tickets on the first level near the homeplate. If you buy those tickets online it would be $70+ each. This dude sold it to us for $35 each and we only needed 3 cuz Kim was “free.” So….we got better seats than we were expecting. My camera isn’t bad ass so I didn’t get great pictures of Ichiro playing.


    Its so weird seeing him prepare to go up to the plate to bat. The way he swings and holds his stance when he’s ready for the pitch, I seriously thought he was permanently pidgeon-toed. I didn’t know that you can bat like that comfortably. Either way, it don’t matter….HE’S STILL CUTE AS HELL!! He may be skinny & scrawny looking, but so what…something about him is just boyishly cute!!


    <<ITS MY BIRTHDAY…>>









    Of course ordered cheesecake and it was damnnnn good!!


    <<Kimmie & Cousins>>




    Kimmie’s cousin Fate is shakin’ it like a salt shaker!! Cutie patooty Vincent, who can resist that face and those big ol’ lips!!

September 23, 2005

September 2, 2005

  • SCHOOL………WORK………….FAMILY……….


    no time for me, lots of time for big ass


    headaches!!


    Where the hell did the summer go?


    More and more responsibility sucks!!


    Kim will be 5 this year, ugh…I’ll be 22…….ew


    Me & Quang will have been together for 8 years this month…whoa!!


    Soooooooooo many:



    • tests
    • skills checkoffs
    • care plans
    • prego women, lots of babies being born, kids with spina bifida/cerebral palsy
    • ANYTHING & EVERYTHING to do with the medical field

    in the end…….


    it all doesn’t compare to what those who have lost EVERYTHING is going through right now.


    Work has been calling me nonstop (for those of you


    with no jobs right now, APPLY AT A


    HOSPITAL!!). All trauma/crisis hospitals in the DFW area are completely FULL!! THOUSANDS of refugees from Louisiana have been sent to Houston, San Antonio, and the DFW and many have already arrived at the hospital where I work. Its the same situation for other hospitals in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area. With a bed capacity of 40 our floor is full. I have NEVER heard this happen at work before. I’ll be working tomorrow, Sunday, & Wednesday. Most likely that will be what my schedule will be like with school.


    Makes me feel like this is my part in helping do something with the crisis going on right now. I’m surprised my school hasn’t had the blood donor RV come by or ask students to donate anything they possibly can. The school I go to is just a bus ride away from where the refugees are staying for the moment. I’ve been nonstop watching what has been going on the news. Its truly unbelievable.


    A tragedy like this, 9/11….all in my lifetime. Tragedies that will forever be remembered in history books. With everything going on I was shocked to see the disgusting behavior of those taking advantage of the sadness by stealing, raping, and killing. God…the nurses/doctors/medical staff that can do nothing but watch those so ill die while they try to help those strong enough to survive. All because they have no more medical supplies. People going into diabetic shock, starving, urinating/defecating in the streets because there’s nowhere else to go.


    If I was already a nurse I’d want to volunteer and head to ground zero to help as much as I could I would GO!!


    God bless those who are in need and those who are doing anything & everything possible to help those in need.

August 23, 2005

  • Bout time I update…..


    Lemme begin with everybody’s favorite…PICTURES!!


    [[summer '05 family trip]]


    1st stop—Seaworld :: San Antonio, TX




    Kimmie got to see Shamu again





    We spent most of the day at the water park



    chillin’ at the hotel


    Pt. Aransas, TX



    he’s always so HORNY…jokin’ around as soon as we got there









    beach time



    Mommy <3 Kim
    I love how you can see her reflection on the shore



    Quang & I were trying to trap the fish then scoop them up, yah…not too successful.



    1st pic: sexy Darlene (brother-in-law’s sister-in-law)
    2nd pic: beautiful Kimmie..I LOVE THIS PIC!!



    TIME @ THE POOL
    1st pic    : Quoc & Thuy, making their very own wave pool
    2nd pic: cutie pie Vincent in his floaty



    Quoc & Quang captured a seagull on the balcony….so of course they had to take pictures of it. After they released, I’m not exactly sure what happened to it.



    1st pic: Thuy & me
    2nd pic: Daddy & Mama Nguyen




    on the Ferry headed for a restaraunt for dinner



    Uncle Quoc caught a yummmmmy crab..no, we didn’t eat it. Hehehe!!



    View from our balcony….good-bye Pt. Aransas


    It sure was great to get away even if it was just for a week. Kimmie of course had a great time at the beach. Too bad Quang couldn’t catch any fish while he was there.


    We all pretty much came back sun burnt, and I’ve never been burned before. It was a whole new experience for me. I’m used to just getting reallllly dark…not burnt + peeling +


    DARK.




    When we got back things of course went back to normal.


    Kim went back to school, Quang went back to work….and so did I. But…now that school is about to start for me again, I’ve decided to take off from work till I can figure out how hardcore school is gonna be. Plus, get the chance to spend time with Kim, Quang, family & friends before I’m a prisoner of books.


    I found out Kim actually missed me while I had been working. This is how it is with her, she’s alwayssss been a Daddy’s girl. So for her to miss me, cry for me, is a surprisingly new thing. I’m used to her arguing with me and crying for
    Daddy. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE IT and it makes me feel special as hell. But…now that I work, it makes me feel even more bad to be gone all the time. The last time I worked I was working 10 days straight without a day off. I figured, might as well give it one big push and work my ass off before taking off. When it finally came the day that I knew I’d be off…..I thought I’d be totally ecstatic and crazy free. But….then following day, I missed being on the floor. I wondered how my patients were doing. I actually missed drawing blood!! I MISSED WORK!!


    Oh..and plus the rude awakening of the outrageous stupidly high price of gas.


    I can’t stop working. Thats it…I need to stay employed. No taking off just cuz I’m in school now. I do still have that choice to do that cuz of course…my family wants me to focus on school and school alone. But I just can’t do that anymore. I NEED MONEY…..shit….who doesn’t??


    MONEY SUCKS BIG HAIRY CRUSTY


    BALLS!!


    At least I got the chance to go out this past Friday. Went to Purgatory with friends and got…..WASTED!! Plus, ended up smoking again. I must confess, I am a social/stress smoker. Thank God I got drunk enough to the point where I couldn’t feel the pain from wearing heels. My friends told me I was in the club telling every girl I saw that I thought they were pretty, hugging them and trying to kiss them. Plus, majority of them (from what I heard) weren’t even that pretty. But……my excuse is…
    everybody on the inside is BEAUTIFUL!! Regardless, it was a great night, and I sure would love to have another one before school.


    Anybody wanna go out to drink &


    dance…LEMME KNOW!!